It's been 10 months since I last posted about Halt and Catch Fire and, well, here we are again.
Without getting too deep into things, a few thoughts that have come up in my recent watch:
* The search for self-acceptance by all the chars and how relational the show is resonates deeply for me.
* The thing I miss most about teaching is the community-building, interpersonal aspects of the work.
* Also, teaching allows me to center joy of exploration over features / traffic / growth.
Calendly does a lot of things right but I'm not spiritually connected to the work.
I love that in HCF, the relationship of the protagonists to their computers is _personal_ products they build is personal too!
This is part of why even the bare aesthetics of the old/handmade web, etc are so appealing to me. A level of intimacy and care in sharing oneself with the world.
I avoided coding for years out of fear I wouldn't be good enough and only dove in after learning Dad had stage 4 cancer.
It's hard for me to figure out what software would be personal for me. Which maybe hints that I'm not an engineer at heart.
I know this much: I have met a lot of people that I love. The friendships I've made and communities I've been a part of mean the world to me.
I _really_ don't know where I want to go next and that scares me lately.
But Gordon said, "Feeling weird is how you know you're still here" and Donna said, "The project leads us to the people"
They know what the fuck is up. 🙏 ✨ ❤️